Archive for Death Track Dolls

Spurred to Action, Roller Derby Rides to Rescue

Posted in Roller Derby with tags , , , , , , , , on July 10, 2012 by Lightning Slim

There’s nothing exciting I can tell you that isn’t eclipsed by the majesty of  Adam Swinbourne’s poster for this weekend’s bout:


He’s a real talent. To think, all those fantastic rollergirls to draw and he almost scotches the whole thing by putting my mug on it! Deets for the bout here:

See your backsides at trackside! Also, forgive me if I look a little ragged on the day; there’s a little something I’m up to the night before.

Slim Pickin’s – Psychedelic Wrap-Up

Posted in Roller Derby with tags , , , , , on May 11, 2010 by Lightning Slim

Originally published at

Hey all,

First off, big ups to all the fans in attendance and the sponsors and vounteers who made the Melt Down such a big success. Thanks to the Beaudelaires – I can’t think of any better soundtrack to a Tramp warm-up than something with a reggae bounce.

Wha Happen? – The first game began as a tight race between the Dishes and Chicks Ahoy, but the Dishes pulled away with a big lead after the Chicks landed in penalty trouble in the second half. The Dishes received tremdous performances from their next-gen jammers Stobbelicious and Skate Pastor. This took some of the heavy lifting away from Lippy Wrongstockings and Motorhead Molly, allowing them to save their energies for precision strikes on the afforementioned Chick penalties. The last few jams showed the Dishes experimenting with a comfortable lead, giving their rookies more track time and letting Stobbelicious display some defensive jamming skills. Final score: 121-63 for the Dishes.

The second game of the double-header found the Tramps missing the presence of injured Gunmoll Mindy as savvy play by the Death Track Dolls often stymied their rookie defenders. Slam Wow and Demolition Dawn seemed tireless for the Dolls, although a clever counter-attack using Konky as surprise jammer in the second half (she’d been quietly but effectively blocking in the first) almost turned the tide of a very close game. Leigh-zzie Borden continues to develop into a real threat to both opposing body and scoreboard. Final score: 101-89 for the Dolls, contested right to the end.

Dance Partners – Chicks Ahoy’s Dyna Hurtcha was in a mood to engage any passing body, although she seemed to have something extra going with Dish defensive tandem Greta Garbage and Stacie Jones. Tramp pivot Freudian Whip held her own putting in some serious minutes against Betty Bomber in a variety of situations.

See Y’all next time! –Slim

Gettin’ Psychedelic

Posted in Roller Derby with tags , , , , , on May 4, 2010 by Lightning Slim

Originally published at

Saturday marks TCRG’s first Double Header! It’s TCRG vs. TORD in a tie-me-up, tie-dye-me-down extra value extravaganza.

The Dishes will be playing Toronto Roller Derby’s Chicks Ahoy and the Tramps take on the Death Track Dolls. All four teams were recently at the Beast of the East tournament and saw first-hand what an inhuman wrecking ball those ladies from Montreal can be as MTLRD went 1-2-3 after 2 days and 28 games. TORD can take some pride in the 4th place finish by their own Gore-Gores.

I think it’s going to be a treat for Tri-City fans as all your favourite rollergirls get to show off their battle scars and the new moves they picked up at the Beast.

The Venue this time: ACTIVA SPORTSPLEX, 135 Lennox Lewis Lane, KITCHENER
Doors at 5, first whistle at 6pm. Trippy colours and clever signs encouraged!

See you in the Suicide Seats,


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