Archive for Tri-City Thunder

Return to the City of Beer

Posted in Roller Derby with tags , , , , , on May 31, 2012 by Lightning Slim

Here I go again – I’ll be following the Tri-City Thunder to Milwaukee for the Brew City Brewhaha. It’s a long drive, but a fun tournament, and I like the local delicacies*


*By which I mean beer. And cheese. They put cheese on everything.

Quad City Chaos 2012

Posted in Roller Derby with tags , , , , , , on March 26, 2012 by Lightning Slim

Fantastic poster art courtesy Adam Swinbourne

Lowdown on this cool tournament by the Derby Nerd is here.

Philadelphia Always Sunny, Thunder Heard Nevertheless

Posted in Roller Derby with tags , , , , on June 28, 2011 by Lightning Slim

Originally published at

 The Tri-City Thunder made their debut on their biggest stage to date at the 2011 East Coast Derby Extravaganza this weekend in Feasterville, PA. This three-day explosion of riotous derby action coupled with fun, sun and poolside shenanigans ended with two WFTDA-sanctioned victories by Thunder over Harrisburg (196-101) and Long Island (150-124). I had the pleasure and privilege to travel with the team and call for their bouts, as well as some just-for-fun challenge bouts such as Emo vs. Metal and Gingers vs. The World (victory for teams Metal and Ginger, both close to my heart).

For recaps, photos and access to video feeds and DVD’s, see our gracious hosts over at

This puts Thunder at 6-4 for the season, and spells good things for their inaugural ranking in the second quarter. I’ll be discussing the ramifications of this and Thunder’s position in the derby world at large in future posts, but for now I think I will emulate the skaters* to relax and savour a successful tournament.

See you in the Suicide Seats,


*Oh please – they’re probably at practice as you read this – these ladies never stop reaching for the top!

Catching Up: Summer Derby Love

Posted in Roller Derby with tags , , , , , , , , on June 14, 2011 by Lightning Slim

Originally published at

June’s not even half over and there’s already a heap of derby under our belts, and more to come! Let’s dive into the June 4th Double-Header:

Things began with a disciplined first half from the TKOs as they put their system to work against the Killer Queens of Royal City. Hampered by some injuries, the Queens had brought some borrowed players from RCRG’s other teams, including blocker Ginger Slaughters and seemingly tireless jammer Hot CrossGuns. This melding of inter-squad talent gave a tantalizing glimpse of the possibilities for Royal City’s all-star team in future contests, and also pressed the TKO jammer contingent to thread the needle in some dangerous situations. Expected point netting from Pandemic Pearl and Rain Blows Brite was well-complimented by some stealthy work by Das Booty.

Photo by Adam Gagnon

The second half of the contest was a night-and-day change from the first, as both teams abandoned systemic play and engaged in an often lawless scramble. Killer Queen Archbitch of Slamterbury grabbed some spotlight time as she put in serious work with star, stripe and bare-helmed. With the penalty pagoda perpetually populated, it was veteran Anaslaysia Killsemov holding down the inside line and paving the way to a TKO victory. Final score: 132-84.

The second game of the evening saw a visit by our neighbors to the south, as the Grade A Fancies of Green Mountain made the trek from Vermont to Oktoberland for WFTDA-sanctioned action. Almost in imitation of the earlier bout, the first half displayed home team Thunder’s better qualities and the second was a street fight. Standouts for Thunder included usual-suspect jammer core Motorhead Molly, Skate Pastor and Lippy Wrongstockings and some nice work from newer sharks Leigh-zzie Borden and Freudian Whip, with the latter sidelined by injury late in the bout. Ice, rest and positive thoughts, Whipper!

In the end, despite amazing desire and some superhuman resistance to steady Thunder hitting (Scarlet Menace and Vagichael Jackson, both diminutive,  took gigantic hits and continued to skate) Green Mountan was overcome by their short bench. Final score: 213-38. Long-distance travel can be deadly; something Thunder experienced themselves as their fatigued and smaller cross-border squad lost to Ohio 131-76. Remember, these ladies do it for the sheer joy of derby, and we’re a ways off from the charter-jet era! 

See you in the Suicide Seats,

Double Header Opens Up June Derby Extravaganza

Posted in Roller Derby with tags , , , , , , , , , , on May 31, 2011 by Lightning Slim

June 4th at the Wilmot Rec Complex TCRG hosts a multi-league, multi-national blast of roller derby that promises serious action for all derby fans. At 6pm the TKOs welcome the Killer Queens of the Royal City Roller Girls. After shutting RCRG out of their own Purple Reign tournament earlier in the season, the Knock-Outs faced a focused squad last weekend in Guelph but still pulled out a victory over Our Ladies of Pain. What will the next chapter be in the Tri-City/Royal City rivalry?

Game 2 features TCRG’s official touring team, the Tri-City Thunder. After a 2011 Mid-West Brewhaha tournament with a decisive win against Paper Valley and a spirited defense against the Detroit juggernaut, Thunder faces the Green Mountain Derby Dames of Vermont, a team you might recognize from the 2010 Beast of the East.  See Thunder on home turf before they go on the road! June also brings bouts in Ohio and Hudson Valley before the challenge of the East Coast Derby Extravaganza.

Derby local and derby global – what’s not to like? I expect serious noise and some creative sign action in the crowd as TCRG take on all comers from down the road and over the border!

-Lightning Slim

Thunder Rolls 2011: News and Brews

Posted in Roller Derby with tags , , , , , on February 24, 2011 by Lightning Slim

  Originally published at

The Tri-City Thunder will be participating in the 2011 Midwest Brewhaha Tournament! This two day tourney features ten regulation bouts between North Central WFTDA Region teams and ten challenge bouts for other incarnations of derby.

The Brewhaha will be hosted by The Brewcity Bruisers of the Milwaukee Rollergirls on May 21 and 22 in beautiful, beery Milwaukee.

More details as we get them – the official site is posted below.

Tri-City Promotes TKO’s to Full League Roster

Posted in Roller Derby with tags , , , , , , on December 14, 2010 by Lightning Slim

  Originally published at

Be prepared to add some Black and Blue to your boutfit in 2011, as TCRG has promoted the Total Knock-Outs to full house team status. The skaters of the former rookie scrimmage squad will now be able to roll alongside the Vicious Dishes and Venus Fly Tramps, take on house teams from other local leagues, and qualify for possible membership in the Tri-City Thunder.

This news comes hot on the heels of TCRG’s entry into the Women’s Flat Track Derby Association’s North Central Division, where the Thunder hope to follow Montreal’s example and make a bit of noise in their WFTDA debut season. 2011 promises bigger and better things for roller derby supporters in the Tri-City area and worldwide!

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